How to become self-confident – TOP ways
The first and only important thing that a person should worry about is himself. It is healthy egoism and understanding of the value of one’s person in one’s own life that is the key to happiness and well-being. That is why it is important to understand how to become self-confident as early as possible.
But it often happens that a person does not seem to live his own life. He is so accustomed to being “invisible" that in the end he stops noticing himself. Such "invisibility" and the desire to dissolve in the crowd appears due to low self-esteem.
A lot of books have been written and a lot of words have been said about how to become self-confident . But all of them are nothing if you do not take any action and do not understand the nature of the appearance of this gnawing feeling.
How to become self-confident
In a nutshell, confidence is a healthy assessment of your capabilities. Understanding by a person that he is the main person in his life and there is nothing that he would not be worthy of.
Uncertainty is, in turn, a complete lack of understanding of one’s own significance, a constant feeling of fear of life. A particularly insecure person depends on the opinions of others. Worst of all, he knowingly believes that it is unflattering towards him.
High self-esteem is something of a habit. This is a character trait that is formed throughout life. It is unique in that it originates in early childhood and the first things that influence its development are our parents. Or rather, the conditions of life, growing up and upbringing that they were able to give us.
However, despite this, it is possible to be a self-confident girl or guy despite the situation in childhood and adolescence. Consider 5 factors that affect self-esteem.
Upbringing and environment
Those postulates and habits that come with us from childhood in one way or another leave their mark on adult life.
We are arranged in such a way that we subconsciously give estimates. Once in a new environment, we look closely, involuntarily (or purposefully) compare ourselves with others, evaluate the situation. And only after all these simple shenanigans do we decide how to behave.
Yes, it may sound crazy, but it’s something that happens to everyone. The time to make a decision can take a fraction of a second.
It has been proven that if a person finds himself in a “weaker” (according to certain criteria) environment, he automatically feels himself “higher”. Especially if it comes not only from within, but is also broadcast from outside.
And vice versa: no matter how confident he is, once in a society where his competence, level of knowledge or other indicators are inferior, he will feel differently.
Interests, appearance and experience
Boredom is the main enemy and at the same time the engine of development. If a person has a hobby, interests – it only makes him better! Involvement in any process, increasing one’s expertise in the matter has a positive effect on self-esteem!
In addition, it is very important to have a hobby throughout life. Please note: children who had circles and sections in their childhood grow up to be more sociable and confident young people. Expanding the circle of communication, the appearance of friends of interest affects self-esteem.
A point that will be obvious to many, but worth dwelling on. The fact is that beauty is a very subjective concept. Therefore, it all depends solely on what message a person wants to “broadcast” with his appearance.
All the experience gained in life also affects self-esteem. Especially "beat" failures. Yes, you need to be a really strong and hardy person in order not to break down and maintain dignity in the face of life’s turmoil.
It is also easy to perk up by achieving new victories!
Confidence and self-confidence
Often people confuse 2 such similar and at the same time different concepts as confidence and self-confidence.
The fact is that the second is a completely unreasonable and exaggerated sense of self-importance. It is not uncommon for a person (especially a teenager) to think about how to develop confidence and take as an example the self-confident braggart behavior model.
But the irony is that under the imaginary pomposity and artificial importance hides an empty and pathetic person whose self-esteem is at zero.
These people are immediately visible. Usually these are bouncers, lovers of criticism and "leaving" against the background of other people who are less successful in a certain context. In fact, it is fear and unwillingness to work on oneself.
It is stupid to argue with such people and even more stupid to try to “siege” them by their own method (humiliation, insult.” To be better means to show on actions.
3 ways to "feed" self-esteem
For many girls, the question of how to become self-confident is especially acute. Especially during the period of hormonal activity, when changes occur in the body and the emotional state is as unstable as possible.
Several ways to boost self-esteem:
- Take care of yourself.
Take a relaxing bath, go to the hairdresser, update your wardrobe – the most common female "anti-stress".
- Work with the surrounding space.
Arriving at an expensive restaurant or richly furnished house, we automatically feel and behave differently. So recreate this atmosphere at home! Clean up, update the interior, think about table setting.
Pay attention to posture, demeanor in society, gestures. Take your hands out of your pockets. Look into the eyes of others, raise your head up!
It is the inner feeling that is the first step to confidence!
5 tips for boosting self-esteem
A few universal tips for men and women that will make life easier and once and for all help get rid of the unpleasant feeling of fear and insecurity.
First: filter your environment. Only you choose with whom to communicate. If you can’t build clear boundaries with a person who doesn’t appreciate you, say goodbye to him. If the life situation does not allow this, then try to keep such communication to a minimum and exclusively in business.
Second, do what interests you. It’s never too late to start learning a language or learning how to play the guitar.
Third, don’t be afraid to ask for help. Working with a psychologist has never harmed anyone, but only made the lives of many people better.
Fourth: help others. And you yourself will not notice how you will feel much better and more significant.
Fifth: make new acquaintances. Chat with strangers, compliment them, talk about yourself. Believe me, you are much more interesting than you think!
And most importantly: there is no universal way to become self-confident. This is not a goal – this is a process, a lifestyle, a habit that can and should be developed at any age!