What are imprints or why we are raised the way we are raised

Today we travel into the past and analyze what imprints are. In the previous article, we started talking about what false goals are in life and in business. It's a hard day. To find the reasons for the false goals that you have formed today, you will have to briefly return to childhood. You are ready?

The previous article ended with the fact that 90% of people living lately feel as if they were already guilty from birth. And all their lives they strive to make amends for their guilt.

Therefore, today we analyze what imprints are, remember our childhood and try to understand how the programs laid down in the past influence our decisions today.

A common attitude among most residents is that other people are vile, dishonest, in their own mind. Corrupt officials in a terrible country. The people have no money.

Today we are talking about the position of "I" and self-esteem and you will find out where your false goals come from and how you evaluate yourself.

Self-esteem is the prism of perception of the world

If you go out to pursue a career from a “plus" position, then you become a lucky person. They are also called "lucky ones".

There are those who have an unstable relationship with this world. Some psychologists call them "some-kakers." These are people who live somehow from the position of “no worse than others”.

How do you go out into the world? Do you tend to be in the plus or stick to the minus position?

The difference doesn't need to be explained. Draw a picture for yourself of how you appear in a minus position. And try to look at the world from a positive perspective.

And now let's continue. Read on, what are the basic settings and what is an imprint.

A bit of jurisprudence: the presumption of guilt and innocence, well-being and trouble

• Most people are familiar with the concept of the presumption of innocence – it is assumed that a person is not guilty by default, unless proven otherwise.
• And now let's turn on the fantasy and imagine that in jurisprudence there is a presumption of guilt. By default, a person is guilty until proven otherwise.

And now the second step. Superposition of two fantasies. Put the last presumption on the personality of a person. We are talking about the guilty person by default. Is it starting to clear up? But that is not all.

• Imagine another presumption, the third order – the presumption of well-being. She doesn't require proof. Because a person is in a state where he knows that everything is in order with him and is not going to prove it.
• The presumption of trouble is when the basic attitude is as follows: “something is wrong with me, I'm somehow not like that, but by my actions and achieving certain goals I can prove to myself first of all and to others that everything is fine with me. all right."

Now let's figure out how our fantasies correlate with reality. Let's take a look at each position step by step to understand where we are. We start with the most unpleasant position “I-minus”.

Position “I-minus”

90% of people feel this way lately. Why do we present such statistics? These percentages are not taken from the ceiling.

Psychologist Vladimir Kurkin, for example, talks about this in his open lectures. We believe him, because he really has a lot of clients lately. And a significant part of them are online.

By the way, it was his work that inspired the authors of this blog to open a week of psychology. And this is not an advertisement. If you haven't noticed yet, our blog has no promotional content at all. We only talk about what we have tested on ourselves or what subscribers recommend to us. In a world where everyone is hunted by ads, sometimes it's good to just read. Without covering the banner ad on your smartphone with your thumb.

But, we digress from the topic. Let's continue. Still, 90% of people are still in the “I-minus” position lately and are likely to be among them.

Why is everything so, where does the flawed life position come from, what forms it and what are imprints

There are several mechanisms for the formation of the “I-minus” position. The first one you should be aware of is called imprinting. Imprinting is what we absorb or “imprint” into ourselves from the environment for the first 7 years of our life.

A very large percentage of adults living today were born in the Soviet Union.

Note: if you also have a famous song on this topic playing in your head right now, listen to it urgently. Otherwise, you'll be listening in your head all day.

What are imprints – society and its programs

In the Soviet years, modesty was considered a very important personal quality. But it was brought to a certain extent to the point of absurdity. Therefore, such concepts as self-love, thinking about oneself were unacceptable for society.

It was acceptable to forget about oneself, to think about one's neighbor, to die oneself and rescue a comrade, and so on. Now remember your childhood or imagine the following picture:

• The child grows next to the mother, who is in the “I-minus” position;
• Hears the conversations of adults who are cultivating the socially acceptable imprints described above.

All this is absorbed not only at the level of consciousness. In the subconscious, information is strengthened that does not bring self-confidence to the child, but forms a feeling in him, which, if you look at it, is unnatural for a person. Even if you want to help others, you must help yourself first. If you do not do this, then an unnatural course of things is formed – this is what imprints are in a negative aspect.

This is well illustrated by an example of emergency procedures on board an aircraft:

Put on the oxygen mask first on yourself, then on the child. Difficult, especially in an extreme situation, isn't it? But even more difficult in everyday life. And soon you will understand why. 

selfishness has been strongly condemned lately. Therefore, people were divided, as it were, into two psychological camps and developed in different directions – some tried to meet the expectations of society, others lived contrary to its laws. One half understood what imprints were on an intuitive level and worked with it, while the other half of society tried to fit their lives into the framework and did not really understand where the discrepancy was.

What are childhood imprints

• When a person does something that parents (as well as grandparents and other relatives who act from the “carrot and stick” position) do not like, they often say to him, unfortunately, already standard phrases, “we don’t love you and don’t appreciate”, “you are bad” and other negative sayings. 
• When parents show different attitudes towards children if there is more than one child in the family. For example, I buy new clothes only for the youngest child and the eldest, and the middle one wears out for the eldest.
• When they make a nanny out of an older child, letting him know that now a younger brother or sister is his responsibility. So, of course, money is saved on a nanny, but the consequences of decisions of this kind can be difficult and unpredictable. Often, older children feel that the younger ones now have all the attention, and not only do they misunderstand the new distribution of roles, they also do not have the opportunity to fall in love with the younger family member. Because all grievances are eventually torn off on him, as on the most obvious reason for their suffering and insecurities.